Your King Fantasy

This is my forth site of those under my Blue Sky. It used to be my last, or seventh, but then I rearranged the order so this one and the one before was moved up and put after the Elfen site. I've changed the order several times and I hope this is the one I will like as it gets boring remembering to update everywhere. The reason I changed it was cause I link from my Green World and I didn't like that some sites were linked together. All the time I've linked my Queen-site with my home, Lyckebo, which makes sense as I'm the Queen of my home. But then I changed the order in my Green World so my Friend-site didn't come next and there the mess began. Now my second Blue site is my Elfen-site and I like that linked to my site on mothers, as it's always been. In my Green World I now have my four sites about my children after my family-site and I wish them to have links to suitable Blue Sky sites. My oldest daughter first got a link to my Lady-site, but I like that linked to my Friend-site, so now I changed so she, as a young pretty woman, instead got her linked up with my Nymph-site. She's way too young to be a lady yet, and she loves art and music, which is the theme on the Nymph-site. This Your King Fantasy is now linked to my oldest son's site, which fits him better then the Faery-site. So the Nymph-site and this King-site were the two I had to move up so my oldest children would get better links. I believe my son much rather be associated with kings and ancient kingdoms, then pretty little fairies and baby angels, so his little sister got that link instead. My younger son got to keep his link to my Angel-site, as those angels are pretty young women and not that many little cute ones. 

So now I've described to you the tale of how and why I keep changing the order of my sites, and also a good reason why I will not do it again, as it sure must be as good as it gets now. I hope to be able to keep my sites up and I'm very afraid it will be impossible for individuals to have personally selfmade websites like this in the future as everything keeps changing. That is the one thing I utterly hate with this human-made world, that it keeps changing so much. Once you've taught yourself one way of doing things, bought some cool stuff and just gotten the hang of it that tech is no more. Suddenly you have loads of junk at home with tapes and machines that is too old to use. You've made lots of stuff on them you cannot see anymore. I hate it so much I rather do things in reality at this moment as when I build something in my real garden it will stay in my garden. The most satisfaction is to actually create something in real life as these crazy people changing everything cannot do anything about that. Well, unless they spray until all the trees and plants die and I have a desert instead. Which seems like it's their plan. I hope not, however, as this life would be unbarable without a living planet to live on and to have nature to walk in. That is kind of what this site also is about, enchanted places. According to ancient tales we've made a mess of this world before, and high civilizations has vanished and been forgotten.

In these tales it's the stupidity and arrogance of mankind that finish the societies, but there are plenty of other causes aswell, that seem to be connected to cosmic events. Every cycle of the great cosmic year it's said to repeat itself just like an ordinary Earth year with spring, summer, autumn and winter. The records says that 12 000 years ago a huge catastrof occured and that it coinciding with when the tales say Atlantis vanished under the water. So the Great Year is something like 24 000 years or something, and during that period there are thousands years of winter and there is where Earth has been now for a very long time, the tale says. This means that we've been suffering the worst horrors imagined for a very long time, and I mean truly horrible things. The counciousness of mankind has been so degenerated and poorly we've more or less fed on each other, litterary. Either people have been trying to rip each others property and wealth off, using each others labor and sucking the life out of others for their own sake, or they've killed and tortured and done even groser things to each other. I could go on and on about the nastyness that's been festering this past Age on the planet and it's not a pretty tale at all. It's hard to know really when it started, when it was at it's worst and if it's even gotten any better. For some it might and for others hell on Earth is still just another Monday.

In my own opinion there are always good people on Earth, but the worse energy we let in, the less can live as they wish to in their good intentions. That is due to the influence of the lower energies, the so called demonic energies. I was listening awhile back about Europe during the 100 year war and what bestowed the people there during that time. It was exactly how you would imagine Hell to be like and nothing else. Warlords were selfishly ravishing the country side and burned and stole and murdered. After a generation of this madness there were no point for the younger generations to keep up trying to re-build their ancestors hard work, which the plunderers had destroyed within a day that had took them generations to build up. So the younger generations were either joining the waring tribes, or they did other bad things to survive. The result was that nobody was building up anything to burn down, and noone was creating things to steal. The worst thing was that there were nothing being planted and grown as food, as whatever you planted was taken from you and people didn't even have seeds anymore to plant due to all the destruction. I'm talking in general form here as there might had been one odd village here or there that was spared, but according to the records vast numbers of areas was put into ashes and in many cases most people in them killed, raped and some women were taken as slaves. 

The lesson lernt was that when you let your greed rule, and you steal what you have not built up from those who have the right to the work, you will follow the road to Hell. As people were starving things got very bad, very very bad indeed. Morals dropped to ultimate lows and there were no right or wrong anymore. Even people with good hearts did things they regretted in some hunger lunacy. Many took their own lives as there were no hope for a future and they could not stand seeing their children starve to death anymore. People were hunting and eating other people and it was so horrible that there is really no other word for it then Hell on Earth. This madness was not created by nature, though there was a mini-Ice Age about this time, so perhaps something started this due to that. I am not enough knowledgeable in this, but I'm sure one can find out more if there is interest for it. During the Middle Ages it began to get colder then it's been during the Viking Age and before that. It's wellknown that changes in climate will cause more warring as people that has not prepared will go hungry and some will think stealing from others to be the solution. It is not. If your gardens did not grow as they were supposed to you have to hunt. If the wildlife isn't providing enough you have to fish. If there is not enough fish you need to work the forests for berries and plants and dig the earth for roots. There are food out there, but of some reason madness take over peoples minds.

The madness arises after centuries of living too easy off the riches of the Earth, and then the conditions changes. People don't want to adapt, and don't have the knowledge anymore to do so. During the Middle Ages the burning of witches and the wise ones began and that was the true beginning of the downfall of mankind in Europe. These were the people that knew every eatable plant, and they were persecuted. At the time of the 100 year war there sure were not many of them left, if any, and most burned by that time is said to be regular women and men. One wonders if that was not some part of the crazyness and maneating madness that went on then, as they are said to have killed millions this way. When looking back at Europes history it's no wonder the white man has done so much horrors in the world at large, nore any wonder they came up with WWI and WWII. All amounts to the same drive - to steal what is not yours instead of building and making something yourself. Cause if you look at it in detail, the person in Europe who is the farmer, or doing any other constructive work, is far less likely to get the idea to go out and plunder others out of the blue, then someone sitting idle doing nothing in a castle. The castle-guy might feel he is a bad lord who cannot bring in enough taxes from his underlings, whom are all struggling to survive, so he wants to ravish someone elses land to do better. Seldom does an hardworking honest man come up with such bullshit.

In my earlier blogs have I mentioned some of my own ancestry, if it's true that is correctly done, as I have not done the investigation myself and as I now know the person doing it is not an honest person I have not much trust in it. But I will still mention it as it might be somewhat correct, if not totally. So according to that I have a line going back from one ancestor to the rulers in many countries. It's mostly three Scandinavian countries, the Brittish Ilses - Ireland included, and also the eastern and south east parts of Europe. But also the Angels of northern Germany, that wasn't called German at the time, of course. It's from that family the word Anglo-Saxians came, as they are part of their ancestry too. This family called Angels are also in my mother-in-laws roots, as she was even named that surname before she married. She's an Angel, you could say, but she spelled it somewhat differently. My ancestor named Angel was said to be the very one founding the country of the Angels - England. It's in England he's joined by blood with the irish family line and much later on also with the Viking line and the Eastern line. It's cause the Vikings ruled in the East and mixed with the blood of the people there. They also mixed with the blood of the Greeks, so it's pretty messy. But the thing is that they were not that careful with keeping the blood pure, as many claim. The Vikings were not, and they concidered all children of the father heirs, not only the queen's. 

In the Viking families there were much infighting and the children generally murdered each other to reach the thrown. Before they changed their religion and only counted the queen's children it was pretty mad, as the ruler had children with many wives and also with slave girls and all were his children. I bet alot of those children really did not like each other and being special, as they were bred by almost a God, they could be quite ruthless in their entitlement, I'm sure. But there were something else very weird with these Vikings, and that was that they had no fear of death. Most died before they turned 25 and by then they already had a few children, so they started early and lived intense, lethal lives. When I read about them it sounds like alot of them were typical psychopaths, but those not conforming to the will of the people were shunned and had to leave the country, so my guess is that being a total psychopath, a liar, thief and trixter, were not very popular back then either. But the thing is that the Vikings did have some kind of democracy where they used the Ting where the other landowners could vote out the King, if he was a total asshat. That is the safeguard against total psychopaths. The landowners were mostly interested in their lands and that it was doing well, and not that much into war. So a too warlike King would be voted out. My guess is however that there was an over production of young men so some wanted to go out and fight instead of work, as their culture made it out as an heroic thing to die in battle.

All these mixed genes of both a little power hungry ruling elite and mostly good honest hardworking humans might have caused some confusion in my own family. The weird thing that I cannot figure out is that there are absolutely no psychopaths on the side were the royal ancestors were found. Not a single psychopath, not one power hungry liar, that on purpose gaslighted and crazy made others to frame them with doing all the bad things the psychopath was doing. So my theory that it was in our genes due to that family line does not hold up, as the psychopathic gene seem connected to the other side of the family. Now nobody has really researched that line and when I digged deep into the royal line I ended up back in Egypt and even traced it back to Sumer. The two mummies I'd found long ago, and that I recently realized indeed could be related to me, reminded me however from the start of my grandfather on the other side, not the side were the line back to them were found. It was very odd, but as I said nobody has truly investigated that tree enough. It only takes one brake in the line, were the records are missing, and you cannot connect the dots. But it's on this grandfathers side there are plenty of evidence psychopathy exists. I don't think he was one however, but that he had on his mothers side inhereted some traits of it. Her family was the Icebergs (translation) and they seem to be very cold people. Pun intended. If that is so or not is hard for me to tell.

The reason I think they had this infliction on that part of the family is cause when under stress grandfather got very abusive with his family. Before he got affected by stress to support his family and threats of war he was a very good father and husband, I'm told. But since he'd lost so much and so many he cared for in war earlier on in life he seemed to be suffering from some kind of post traumatic stress or something of the kind, so he could not handle not being able to control his life as the government stopped his ability to take care of his family. He was a travelling engineer and needed his car to got to work, so they took his car from him during the war, and he could no longer bring in any money. They still had the farm, but it was rented out to a farmer and all they recieved was the rent and some milk. My grandfather was not the farming kind atall, so he'd not be suited for that work. His father had been a businessman who ran a brewery in Finland, but they lost everything, except this farm, when that country was invaded by the Russians. It was the Russians that slaughtered all grandfathers childhood friends and their families and that stole everything from his parents. The parents barely made it back to Sweden alive. Many of the friends being killed I'm sure were swedes too, so I do understand the long hate for Russians in this country. At the same time the Vikings did rule that part of the world too for centuries and it's weird how the Russians today not really seem to remember that.

Another thing they don't seem to know, and even less comprehend, is that the Samish people used to be much more plentiful and lived all around the globe in the Northern hemisphere. I don't know if this is common to not know, but once I tried to debate it with a Russian academic and he totally denied this fact. My theory, based on DNA studies, is that there has been a slow mix of the Samish people, or the Siberians, which are the same, and other races and that what we later on have been called the Slavic people are nothing else but a new race made up of this mix. Just like the new race of Mexicans, which they know are made up of indians, latins and some black blood. I think that  was it, or maybe some more race was involved in this new race. New races come to be all the time and it's nothing new. It's like with dogs, so why do some people revolt when it comes to humans? The Russians seem to think the Slavic race had nothing to do with neither the Siberian (Asian DNA) nore the Nordics, which I feel is realy odd belief. That since it's in the history that the Vikings ruled over them for centuries and that Novogorod were inhabitated by very asian looking people, described by the Vikings in details. They sound pretty much like a mix of the Asian race and a little bit of a more European race to me. 

When looking at photos from my husbands relatives from the most northern area or the Scandinavian penisula going back more then 100 years there is no doubt they are of Asian origin. Some do look dark and European however, so why am I then wrong? The DNA studies say I'm not. According to the Asir sagas there were many groups of people in the ancient times. The Asirs were one such group, and the Vanes were another. They also clearly describe a group that sounds exactly like the Samish people. How they describe the Asirs they sound very blond and fair, like how we typically picture the Nordic type today. The description of the Vanes is less clear, but since Frej and Freja were of the Vanes you might imagine they were quite fair too, but not as fair as the Asirs. I picture them a little in the middle and it's also told they lived by the sea, so perhaps they were the red heads, like the Phonecians? The Vikings are definitly tracing their roots back to both these lines, and they are also admitting to have some roots in the third group. But that is more ascribed to the Loki side and it seemed like they already then looked somehow down on this line. Still they describe this group as a mountain and forest living people, who were swift on skiing and the bow. And they are described as fierce warriors, even though they were not tall like the other groups. Isn't that a perfect description of the Finns? Or the Samish, as we call them these days as it's a name they like themselves. But in ancient times their name was the Finns, and if you read the sagas they are named something else.

On Ireland there are tales of islands and lands to the far north and from there they collected some very treasured objects. If one is interested it's easy to find out alot about this. One of the places in north such an object was retrieved from was called something very like the name of the Finns. So to me it's clear this land to the north were the Scandinavian countries. For a very long time Ireland was also ruled by a group of "Gods" that was called Tuta de Danan, and as there is a land in north named that in our language, not in english as it's called Denmark today, but Dana land in the old days, it's pretty clear to me it was Danes ruling Ireland back then. Danes might very well just been the term of a folk group originating from one of the Danish islands and they travelled on their Swan ships to Ireland long time ago and conquered it. That is what the old tales of Ireland says happened, when it mentions the Tuta de Danan and how they came to rule Ireland. That they went by Swan ships from the islands in the north and all that. So of course it makes sense it was the "Gods of Dana", as the word Tuta I've been told means something like the Ruler or the Gods. As I said my ancestors are said to be both the kings of all three western Nordic countries, and they were also ruling some of the great islands out in the sea. They were also those that came from the Mediterrainian and conquered Ireland from the Tuta de Danan, but the new king married a princess from the land, so she most likely was of Tuta de Danan blood.

It's very confusing I know, but it's obvious that we are all the descendants of these people by now, as the mixing and breeding has gone on for thousands of years, so who cares really what can be proven and what can not. We all have the warrior genes in us, more or less, and we can all be infected by any psychopathic tendencies to take what is not ours, to kill for the thrill. All these heroes of the old are really not that cuddly and nice as they sound by the fairytales. It's pretty gruesome really. I'm sure alot of innocent people were sacrificed for the greater good of these horrible rulers and power hungry adventurers. I can toss around these tales and go all proud and sobby eyed over their great deeds, but I see through them and their megalomania. They were killers of their own kin and whatever great country they managed, in the end, build up, some crazy relative of theirs later on ruined everything. I'm thinking about Ireland here alot, as in the end it seemed like peace ruled that green rock in the ocean for many centuries. There were little battles here and there perhaps, but more or less there were hundreds of years that my ancestors are said to have ruled in peace parts of the island. I don't think they ruled it all so much, but some times they did, as they mostly seemed to rule the suthern parts of Munster. It's very weird as I used to sing the song of Tipperary alot as a child, and it turned out that my ancestors ruled that part for 700 years.

It all seem to have gotten to an end after St Patrick and the Romans ruined Ireland. Then on my irish family tree goes over to England and Mercia for a few hundred years. That story then ends as it always seems to end, when two brothers started to fight for the throne. One brother was on the throne and he had his other brother put as the ruler of the northern parts, which he didn't fancy and wanted to rule it all. So they battled and battled. A cousin, and also an ancestor of mine, came to England to help the ruling king to deal with his bothersome brother, and helped out in the battle. While they were happily killing each other like the stupid eggheads they were, the devious William the Conquerer sneeked into the country from the south. The brothers and the cousin was up north fighting, remember. So tired of battle, and far away, the kings army did not have a chance. Then I believe they killed one of the kings too. Think it might had been the norweigian cousin, but I'm not sure and I don't want to look it up again as it was a sad reading the first time. So this is the story why England was taken over by the Normandie forces and it was nothing like I've been told before. There were nothing heroic in Williams behavior and nothing great about the kings brothers actions. Cause while his brother was fighting to get more, they both lost everything. Thanks alot, you prat of a brother!

This all goes back to present day infightings in my family. It's all connected. When we were to settle fathers estate I was dead clear that I wanted no part of it as long as either the second brother, or the youngest sister, owned any property on the estate. I wanted to sell all my shares and get free from their evil influences, as they are vile indeed. This I was so clear about to the lawyer who was to settle the estate, and I said it very clearly to him. When he suggested that we'd split the estate in two parts and that the liars would get one and we one I said a big fat no to him. The oldest brother, the true heir, said nothing at the time, so he didn't oppose my opinion either. He however has said the very same to me, that he cannot imagining having anything to do with the estate as long as they are still there. Not cause he does not want to, but cause he knows his younger brother would keep fighting him and acting like a real prat if he did. So it's cause we are realistic we don't want to. Cause we know how horribly they'd treat us as they are treating us horribly right now and they have been for as long as we've known them. If we do as we are told, and give them everything, they might grant us the mercy of getting some crap we don't want. Then they will stand there in their hero capes and pretend they've given us all we wanted and that we are ungrateful and nasty towards them. They are in short real prats.

So the lawyer tried to settle the estate and before that he told me and the true heir that we had less of a connection to our ancestry then our younger brother and sister did. First - that is a total contradiction to the law of the land. Second - he had absolutely no proof of his statement, but the lies and proclamations done by these bastards themselves. To be honest we felt totally humiliated when the lawyer told us this, and we didn't know what to say really. We were so shocked he could even dream up telling two children to a father that they had less connections to him then two other children of his. It was so surreal that when I mentioned this to our own lawyer he didn't believe me at first, but then he read it and it's there in black and white. So the lawyer made a suggestion that the ones he thought was more heirs to fathers estate was to have all the houses and all the farmland and half the forest. Us two lesser children was to have no building and only some rotten swampland and the rest of the forest up north on the estate were hardly any roads lead. I got so furious when I saw this I totally raged for days. I cursed the bloody lawyer like I've not cursed anyone but the old farmer that shot my kitties back when I was seven years old. I cursed that farmer to a slow painful death, and less then three years later he had indeed died in the most painful illness known to man.

If that had anything to do with my curse I leave for you to believe what you want about. I only know it shocked me to find out, as it took until I was 14 before I did and I said I'd not make death curses again. So I changed my mind. I did so as all my non-lethal curses so far has always come true, and I'm fed up with evil people thinking they can cause me pain and suffering. All I wanted was to be treated as I was equal to my brothers and sister. This was all the true heir wanted too. He was not greedy and did not make any claims, like his full of himself brother did. The actions of this younger brother is so foul and wicked it's truly not worth even giving any attention to. I've blocked him out of my life since May 2013 when I wrote a mail directed both to him and mother that I would have no more to do with them, as they rather believed I was a liar, then listened to reason. Neither of them bothered to reply on that mail, and since then I read nothing from them. If they try to call me all I tell them is to not call unless they wish to make amends and repent what they've done to me. Of course that will never happen as their only wish is to humiliate me and also the true heir. That is their whole purpose with all they've done. These are truly wicked people I tell you, which makes me think about the nastyness by brother's like the one causing the king of England to loose the country to a foreign power and hence pushing the people into misery.

I've heard so many state that it was the end of England when William came, and the beginning of their misery. For hundreds of years they had been friends with the Vikings and there were no more fights. The Vikings had become christians too, which was what the whole debackle was about really. I will not talk about that too, as it's a whole different tale, the religious wars in Scandinavia and how my ancestors were on both sides fighting each other to death. Again, the same shit as in my family where some wish to gain power and money to humiliate and impoverish the others. It's done very sneaky as any benifits they have gained they count as a cost for them, while an equal benifit for us others they'd count as a gift to us. Here is an example; if they had rent free buildings for their own disposal for many years they'd call every expence on these buildings as costs, and they'd ignore all the rent they never paid. If they paid no power and rent, all they might had paid was their own betterments of the buildings. The younger brother, older then me mind you, must have gotten very envious when his baby sister just barely turned 20 claimed she for free got the lovely summer house he so loved. She then hardly did a thing on the house, but believes every little thing she should be re-paid for, which like never will happen as she didn't pay rent nore any electrical bills and much else, she never paid.

By now I've proven to them she own me hundreds of thousands due to this house, which made her take back her claims on getting paid for having a free house for 20 years. Stupid cow! She'd been defaming me as the cheep one and there was the proof, who's a cheep cow. She is. If she'd gone on wanting to get paid for the benifit of having that house she'd even have to pay her brothers money as she all together, after my calculations, own the estate more then a million. She'd not get a cent out of the estate, that's how much she'd own us. She'd have to pay me about half a million, and each brother about a quater of a million. So she changed her cheep mind, when she realized she could not get paid for reaping a benifit for decades. Her envious brother had made father build him an outhouse he had himself paid money to get liveable, so he's hating me now. Of course he is, cause he's a stupid asshat. I'm not the one he should be mad at, but since he's like as intelligent as a flee there is no reasoning with him. His mommy says I'm stupid and mean, so he believes his mommy, as he's a mommy boy. Bad mothers truly cause great destruction and you know who I blame to cause this in our family? I blame the founding cause to be mother. The second to blame is our sister, who's a tight ass, money grabbing little liar. And I will keep on claiming that until the curse she put on herself and her husband befalls them.

The third guilty person is however the younger brother, who is older then me. His envy of the true heir is obvious and so is his envy of how the baby sister got the summer house for nothing. Only she didn't. Father made sure that she didn't get the will she wanted him to sign, where she wanted the house to be a gift from 1992. Father instead made a document that we had to approve, or it would not be legally binding, and he made only the house hers if she paid for it what it was worth. Today. So that is the bloody lie she's been spreading - that he signed the agreement with the content from the unsigned will. That is the proof she's the connieving little bitch she is, as I have nothing to do with this shit and I could not care less. I will still loose alot of money and I've hardly gotten anything to start with. Mother and father told me I hardly had, and they were right. But now mother lies to the lawyer and tells him I'm the one of us sisters getting alot. She's so burnt on the stake that wicked witch. I'm sorry to tell you but my mother is a very evil, wicked witch, just like the ones you see in nasty fairytales. One that harm young people and are very depraved morally, though on the surface looks like a sweet old lady. She's not. Or she'd not lie like that. She even framed her golden boy in the mail to the lawyer, so why is he pissing at me? I've done nothing of what he blames me for, his beloved evil witches have. 

There are a difference between a good and a bad witch and the difference is that bad witches lie and do bad deeds, while a good witch fight to put things into balance and help the innocent. A good witch is creative so I make alot of things of beauty. Some you see here as gifts. The first, third, forth and sixth graphic is all due to my own design, using others art of course. The second, fifth, seventh, eight, ninth, tenth and eleventh I made with the help of tutorials. Most I used another graphic for then suggested by the tutorial. Only on the fifth, ninth, tenth and eleventh it's the original graphics. I made an extra space to the right of the graphics on the tenth to put the text and on the eleventh I took away the background frame to make a tag instead as how the tutorial suggested. The greatest weapon we do have against pathology and nastyness is to create and make our own wonderfully beautiful world around us. When we do that we feel no need to connieve and lie and feel envious about others rights. We will not need to lie to make our siblings feel insignificant, and make out our parents cared more for us. Or other nasty nonsence. Which I'm sure all this drama is all about, the wish to show me and the true heir we are less loved then them. How utterly pathetic, as in the end that is just their own mischief and smear causing people to even believe such stuff, that us two are less connected and deserving less. It's pure bullshit and all down to their bullying and propaganda. Nothing else, and nothing real.   

Queen Angelica - Fairyland Poetry

Your Elfen Fantasy

In my last blog about my websites I talked about my personal site, Queen Angelica. I go under the nick Angelica, as it's the name I intended for my fifth child that was never to be. I also spoke alot about my fairytale group Fairyland Poetry, which just like this page here is alot about elves and fantasy. This page was made for my children and all children, living and remembered. These gifts are from that site, which I call Your Elfen Fantasy. At the beginning this site was dedicated to my oldest daughter, who was a wonderful and creative fairy member of my group Fairyland Poetry, and went under the nick Elfen Yavanna. So it was made for Elfen Yavanna, but then I included a webring named Beloved Children to the site and added all the other three children, so it was renamed. I don't really remember all the ins and outs of this, but I think that was pretty much how it happened. Luckily I will not be put on trial for this one, so I don't have to swear it was so. I have had way too many sites and changed them way too many times to remember it anymore. Besides, I forgot everything about my previous life back in November 2011. Truly I forgot it all for awhile, but then some of my memories came back. First who I was and my closest family, and then more and more memories. But things that mattered alot before, like my websites, are not very clear. 

I don't know how it works, but to me it was like someone pushed the reset button on me and afterwards I was uploaded again with my memories, but not distorted and manipulated, like before, but clean and honest, as things really happened. It's like a mist or a fog had been lifted and the closest thing I can compare it to, is a computer that has been infected by a virus and you clean it all out before you re-upload a copy of the memory that is without the virus. I've always been obsessed with matters not important, as if focusing on minor little things, like details on my website, obscured matters of greater concern for my psyche, but which was too painful to go into. I don't really know why, but somehow things that used to be painful isn't anymore. Things that used to be tremendously hurtful and horrible to even look at I seem to be able to analyze and contemplate without that much effort after this occured. It was like I saw every action by others in my life for the first time. I remember very strongly how it literary felt like I saw people for the first time and realized things I'd never actually understood before. 

Some old relatives and their families I saw in a totally new, brighter light then before, while others I was abhorred how horrible and fake they behaved. Had I not seen this before or was I only in deep denial, one might ask. I don't know, but it felt refreshing to be able to react strongly against things that were clearly not healthy. You need to see others to react properly towards them. Before you do you might just accept and introject any shit they throw at you. One thing I did realize very soon was that if I kept socializing with the destructive people I would soon be infected by that virus again, and then very soon go back to accepting their shit again. It's easy to forget to get along and when you are with disordered people they will always pretend that anything nasty and foul they've done to you didn't happen. For instance, they might act really sweet and loving just hours after framing you in public once again for a crime they themselves have done, after you've confronted them with doing that before. When they seem so totally over this little argument of yours you feel accepted by them, like they've forgiven you for getting upset, and not long after they have caught you in their web again. I mean, if it's them being caught lying and you being upset with them, why should you be thankful they have forgiven you? That is the virus starting it's magic.

This mind virus also works in other weird ways, that are definitly not healthy. One way is that you start to feel grateful for being able to help out alot for nothing, while the other one demands admiration and payment for anything they do. That is typical on work places, but also in private relationships when people are under a spell, which is what I call being infected by this mind virus. Another way is that you start to believe that the others have entitlements, rights, that you could not even begin to dream of having. You wont question things like them getting really expensive gifts or loads of help or anything you could never ever have. This is the same virus now infecting the planet almost on a global scale, though many on the deprived side of this coin do see it and are not infected. Most, if not everyone, on the recieving end are however severely infected. I am talking about the rich getting filthy richer, and more and more people struggling every day to pay their bills and have a decent life, while nobody should have to live that way. It's all a construct to make the haves feel superior and the haves not feel crappy. I don't even think they do this to others cause they want all they take, but cause they enjoy the pain and suffering they cause by taking it and making sure those being stolen from know they are helpless against their thievery.

That is what I truly believe is the cause of all unfairness and all the horrors and cruelty, specially towards children, in this world. A wish from the evil minds to feel superior and then needing others to suffer, as they then can compare themselves to those and feel great about not being in those poor sodders shoes. If everyone was happy and had a decent life they could not do that, as they'd be just like everybody else, and I truly believe evil minds find enjoyment in harming others, seeing them suffer, but being good at making it out as that is not the case. That is the people who hurt children either physically or mentally, while pretending it's somehow for the greater good. One needs to really look at an issue with clear sighted eyes to see when we're being bamboozled into mistreating others or letting others mistreat us. The virus renders us unable to see what is going on and that someone is pissing on our face and enjoys it. With the virus gone we can start to protect ourselves from those who mean us not well, and then we can finally take back our world from the crazy psychopaths that are hurting so many beautiful people right now. They bomb and kill innocent children and others daily, cause they have infected too many with their virus.

To me it's been a huge eye opener when I started to talk about the abuse going on when I grew up. In my mind I thought everyone experienced stuff like that in their families in my days, and that it was nothing. But then I found out that most people, if not everyone I know in real life, had not. I remember that I had asked my parents many years ago about their childhoods, without bringing up what they did to two of their own children when we were small. So they answered both of them without even thinking about us, their now adult children, but only thinking about themselves. My father answered very proudly that of course his dear parents didn't beat him as a child. They didn't beat any of their children, as they didn't believe in that kind of punishment. So why did my father then? I think he'd forgotten by then what he used to do to us, as it was his wife who made him do it. I think he was weak minded and just obeyed orders from her, without considering what harm he was causing when acting out on her orders. When I had asked mother she seemed also proud, but more like she was not punished as she was a good child, and that was why. So, she had not been beaten either. That is the main issue here, that she had not. 

I was told by her that her older sister was abused and also the third child, the oldest son. So in mothers family the oldest daughter and the oldest son were physically punished. And that happened to also be the first and the third child. Which children did mother order father to beat? She ordered him to beat the first child and the third, the oldest son and the oldest daughter. That is so weird. The second child in her family was herself, and she thought herself as being so good so she was not beaten. Who was never beaten or ever punished for anything in my family of birth do you think? The second child. Is all of this coincidences or is this the repetetion of malignant behavior from the family of origin by a disordered person? I believe so. It's just too spooky to only be a fluke. She was not beaten for a reason - she was good. She deserved better treatment, so then the second of her own children also must be good and deserving more. Kind of mentally ill logic, I guess. The same kind of insanity the filthy rich suffers from. That is those creating war and havoc on earth, just to earn more money and feel good about themselves, while knowing they have ruined the lives of thousands upon thousands.

They can do this as they truly believe that these people they harm are not really human, as that is how sick these people are in their minds. They feel entitled, special and so very good. The ones that are murdered in their wars and crimes are low lives anyways, and they are dirty and filthy. I don't really know what sick things they actually believe, as I've only picked up a few things from this kind of personality disorder, where they talk about how some people deserve less, as they are stupid and made to serve and have nothing of worth to attribute to the world. The things they say can be so foul and horrendous, as they just can't know this about unknown people. It's just an assumption they've made about others, watching a few others from far away. And one person saying things like this is the second child my mother selected to be good and worthy. The reason people like this needs to put down others is to make it alright that they are steeling from others and using others. By saying that some people don't deserve better treatment, and don't even want anything better, they can live with themselves, feeling good and honorable, while being nothing but selfish thieves to the core of their black, cold hearts.

There are many theories that the psychopathy turns up more in certain families. Also, there are proof that all psychopathy is not the same, that there are different kinds either making the cold hearted monster violent and raging quite openly, or very calculating and observing, which is very overt and hidden to others. The end result will however be the same - pain and suffering for the innocent. The violent psychopaths seem to have some kind of warrior gene, of the violent kind, that makes them able to harm others physically without feeling any remorse. If totally out of control they'll be very devestating and create terrible situations, of course. Such people are often found in jail for doing violent crimes, but in old days they might have had a function, as long as they didn't get out of line. My thought is that someone actually wanted this kind of mindset for some reason, and made it happen. I mean, actually put that violent mind into some humans and created violent, warring blood lines. Also a psychopath can be acting in both these ways during different situations, so a psychopath who can control him- or herself, but also be a coldhearted killer, might be the most useful combination. Castaneda claims the predator put his own mind into us, and perhaps this is it.

The predator might be another race, since there once walked giants on earth and there are plenty of proof of that. Also there are all these cone heads, that are definititly not cradle shaped human skulls, but much much larger and have abnormal bond structures and odd holes in them, that human skulls do not. So maybe these cone heads were of the giant race, or some other race. I call the cone heads the elves, like the ones you see in the Saga of the ring series. Those elves had pointy ears, longer faces then us and also a bigger brain. They were much more intelligent then homos sapiens and had abilities we have yet not, or we've lost them long ago for some reason. One reason might be cause these beings came here and remade us into their image. So we now look like them. How did we look before, who knows, but now we look like these elves, with faces like them. I don't know if the elves, or cone heads, had anything to do with these predators that are talked about, that ruled this earth in earlier years, but my guess is that they are the same. They were very cruel and were said to feast on human flesh. Another idea I have is that they were the flesh angels, which is another expression for them, and not to be confused with the spirit angels.

Remember all the tales of the vampirers? Consider that these strange beings ate humans, looked like us, kind of, that fits in with the vampire tales. Some of the more ancient, original vampires are often shown much different from humans, so perhaps they too changed looks. Perhaps it's not so much we who've changed our apperance, as them changing theirs to look like us? And that would explain why you don't see any pointed ears and cone heads anymore. They've changed all their looks so close to ours we can see them anymore. According to the bible they did take women, meaning raping them, and making babies with them to create a mixed race called Nephelim. The children of these "fallen angels", aka flesh angels, then became the kings and rulers of this earth. Anyone able to trace their roots back thousands of years can only do that if their ancestors were of the Royal bloodline, hence loads of Nephelim blood. So is it surpricing if there are way too many psychopaths in families like that? No, that fits the profile, and it should also be the very calculating kind, not the raging lunatic kind. Well, a few of them are bound to be that way, but the majority of them will be highly intelligent and devious. 

To me it's natural that the more evolved and intelligent a being is, the more peaceful and in harmony with others they are. But unfortunately there is a very long distance from where humankind is today, till that is even close to happening. Most intelligent people are only intelligent in some areas, and not in all. You need to be highly intelligent in your emotions, you heart, to be evolved beyond the pettiness and selfishness many intelligent psychopaths have only reached. They might think themselves evolved and beyond others, that are living more simple lives in union with their families and friends, but it's just not true. It's actually often the opposite. The less in union you are with others, the less you try to understand and show consideration to those you have in your life, that more you use them and abuse them for your own selfish needs, the less evolved you are. Many compare these people to intelligent 2-year olds, that is what they are acting like in many cases emotionally. As long as they get what they want, now, all is fine, but hell brakes loose with huge tantrums when opposed. So of course, when many of these types are born into rich families, they will be able to get alot what they want. They will easily end up in positions of power too.

I'm not saying that all the elves, or the Nephelim, or whatever name we might call them where evil. Some might not had been. There are tales from Sumer about how one of the gods, which must had been like the father race of the Nephelim, tried to save the humans from extinction, when others wanted rid of all. Some seemed to be great thinkers and having high morals, just like us humans are different from each other, so surely were they. Once I wrote a fairytale about the elves, and in that tale the most evil ones were the oldest kind, the least advanced, and they were vampires and warring murderers. They'd lived for millions of years and plagued our world from time and time again, coming and going during different eras. I made another kind of elves that was the maker of nature and wildlife, who tampered with our genes, mixed their DNA with our ancestors and created modern day humans. They created all sorts of creatures, half humans, shapeshifters like wolfmen and much more. These were the elves of the hunt, but they were also magnificent organizers and created huge armies, and they often fought the ruthless vampires and evil magiciance of the old in devestating wars, as the first ones hated all the second ones had created. It was the second comming elves that loved the humans enough to want to keep them, the first ones only wanted to feed on them and slowly extinguish all.

Just like the first ones came and left time and time again, did the second ones, only they came and left with shorter intervalls. That's why they considered this planet more theirs then the first elves, as they were here more and had created more. The first ones only took and fed, never contributed to anything but themselves. The second ones were far more evolved, of a higher emotional intelligence, and showed every so much more neutrality between good deeds and evil deeds, then the first ones, who thrived on others pain and misery. The first ones were the psychopaths, the deprevated demons and the most ruthless of predators. The second kind had traits of psychopathy, but they could also show valor and mercy. They came with set of rules of how to conduct themselves, and were the creator of law and order. Whenever they ruled the earth there would be both great wars and conflict, but also some kind of order and ability for the population to seek redemption when unjustly treated. All in all their way of behaving is what we see in the planet today, like if they are ruling this very time. At the same time we see great evil, as if the first kind is here also, lurking in the dark, trying to create even more war and conflict, as the second kind will not war just for the fun of warring, but for a profit or an rational reason, not just insanity, like the first kind. 

My thought was that they all came to be from the same source, eons ago, but then evolved in different directions. After they split up in two directions the first ones got worse, while the second group changed to the better. They evolved. They got more scientific, more intelligent, and more caring. I also made up a third group of elves, that had split off much later from the second group. They were the creators of all the gardens, with wonderful fruits and seeds. They ruled the earth from when the agricultare era begun and taught mankind to grow the fields and plant their gardens, so hunting and looking for food would be less needed. While the second kind put the wildlife in pens, and created horses to use as riding animals, the third kind designed perfect farm animals, and all these wonderful vegetables we enjoy. They were more vegetarians then flesh eaters and they loved their humans very much, and let them work on their farms and treated them very well. They also came and went from this planet, but with very short intervalls, that made them stay here much more then even the second kind. They were the ones creating all the kingdoms and countries you have heard of, starting with Sumer long ago. Being of a more peaceful nature the wars of history all were the products of either the second or the more devestating ones, the first elven race.

In my Saga I also added one last forth race of elves, which had come in the very last hundreds of years and never left after they arrived. They were the pure light elves and had evolved from the third race, as they stopped eating flesh and other living creatures and only lived on the fruits given to them by the beautiful gardens they created. These creatures were both elves, but also so far away from the original first elves you could ever imagine. They all came from the same sourse, but while the darkest of their kind choose to devolve ever and ever into manifesting more and more pain and suffering for others, while thriving through lies and manipulation, this last group had went the totally opposite direction and search for the perfect unification with others. They only seeked love and harmony, and created more and more beauty and art for everyones free enjoyment. They only seeked everyones happiness and fullfillment and being such pure creatures they built beautiful places with the help of the power from the source, which can override any gravity and turn all into energy. They needed no slaves and could manifest anything their mind could imagine from the ether. They were like gods walking on earth, but also they were still very quiet and lived within the walls of their great white palace, shining their light on the world to help all humans evolve beyond their dependance on the first races and their viles.

I wrote that story as we do have a choice, and if these cone heads, which I call the elves, truly were so evil once they need not stay that way. They might have evolved to something else, as that would be their choice to do so. Some might had stayed just as evil, or even gotten worse, as that would had been the choice of them to do so. We all as humans have the same choice, we can choose to backstab our own kin, rob them of their inherance or mistreat them and lie about them. We might choose to frame those who've showed us nothing but love and care and we might murder all love given to us. We have the choice to treat others poorly and only think about our own well being. But by doing that we are choosing the same slippery slope the first elves choose, which led them into a very dark place. Like I said they became the vampires and evil magicians, but they also turned others and themselves into zombies, walking deads with not soul left. It was the choices they made lifetime after lifetime that brought them into that nightmare. In every lifetime you get a choice, whether you notice it or not, you do get a choice. Nobody will judge you when you make the choice, but you will always have to reep what you've sowed in your own life. In every life you will also choose what hardship you will suffer, not cause you have done something to deserve hardship, but cause your higher self wish to evolve. 

Stupid people not understanding karma will believe people having hard lives have done something in previous lives to deserve this, but that is not how it works. Hard lives can be choosen by the purest of souls to mature into even higher understanding and compassion. Only those who have truly suffered will know how it feels to suffer, will have opened their minds and heart to the most helpless and weak. That is why the innocent are suffering so much in our world, as the innocent souls choose to experience pain from the recieving end, to help them choose to never give pain. Not cause they used to hurt others in other lives and enjoyed it. That is not the case, I believe. No, I believe it's the other way around. Those enjoying hurting others most times choose easy lives, where they can sit in a sofa and push a botton and kill thousands without a thought in their head. Their karma will be the loss of their souls, the becoming of robotic creatures, which was why I gave the first race of elves robots as servants. They create only death, zombies and robots, nothing of life and beauty. They enjoy alcohol and other drugs that numbs the mind and fornication without any love or care for their partners. It's the empty, shallow lives filled with tricks and treats to make it bareable and fun. But it's just like a circus, empty after the show is over.

To truly recieve in this world you have to reach inside your heart. You have to go inside and seek the meaning of everything, and the answer resides in your heart, your ability to love. When you fill your soul of what is inside you will no longer yearn and wish and want anything that is of this shallow, superficial world of glamour and noise. You will hear the song of the eons, see the light of the source and you will be filled with unity with all that is and was and always been. That is when you realize all the rest is silly and petty. The lying and manipulation done by the dark souls are so foreign anything can be, to a soul filled with the grace of the unity of our origin, our true selves. I could not even begin to make you understand, but the love and unity you feel when truly home is just pure bliss rushing through your every cell like nothing you could feel or experience on this earth. Perhaps you could get a glimps when truly high on love, having the greatest sex with that special one or jumping off a cliff in only a rope. It happens sometimes the brain give off some chemicals that come close, but never near enough to that true bliss of the source. And the knowledge and wisdom you have when home is not even possible to try and describe.

The fighting and killing and lying and steeling is plain silly when you know all this. You see how deluded all the psychopathic con artists are, how useless and shameful and meaningless. In the end they are only hurting one person and one person only with all their evil intent and deeds - themselves. They could not really hurt another, on a greater scale. Yes, they can both physically and emotionally hurt you here in this reality right now, but on the greater scale they can not. Remember that when you are a sufferer from severe trauma abuse by these low life selfshitters. They can not touch you as you are a being originating from source, eternal and one with everything. You are beautiful to the core, as you have choosen to experience these low lives abuse. You have offered yourself up as a test for them to choose to hurt or to change their ways and evolve. If they hurt you, they are the ones now paying the price on the greater scale of things. I know it does not feel that way. You might think that they are getting out of all this without a blemish on them, but nothing could be further from the truth. Don't look on what you can see with your eyes, but what you can feel in your heart. They are not getting scot free out of nothing.

Now I've talked alot about the psychopaths, the Saga I wrote about the elves, which is a story about choosing to be a psychopath or a real soul in union with all that is, was and will be, and always are. The site I am promoting here does not however deal with these issues. It's on a much lighter tone and has some graphics on it and a few things for my children too, which I doubt anyone else would be interested in. It was made long time ago, when they were all much younger, and now they are all growing up, becoming adults very fast. We made up names for them, which I don't think anyone of them uses anymore, like Elfen Yavanna for my oldest girl, and Knight Sindar for my oldest boy, and Prince Lorien for my youngest boy and Princess Elanor for my youngest girl. The names are all from Tolkiens fairytales and also names on cats we've had. Elanor was my youngest girls first cat and she was all white with yellow eyes. One day the little girl woke up one morning and came to me and asked me where her white kittie was. I told her she had no white kittie, but she was sure she did. When we shortly afterwards went to the shop I saw the first advert ever on their board about some white kitties wanting new homes, so I rang them up and my little girl had her white kitty in real life, now.

On the first page of the site I have an image of dolls supposing to be the four children in the tale of Narnia. Ever since I was a child I've loved that tale and I read all the books when in school. They also reminds me of my four children as they are like those children. My oldest daughter reminds me of the older girl in that Saga, and the older boy there is the blond one, just like mine. The younger boy is the dark one, both in my real life and in the story, and the youngest girl is just a cute and sweet in my family as in that childs tale. So I have put that image there cause of those reasons. The whole site is very light, but it's also dedicated to all children that we've lost. Many parents have had babies that they could not keep for long, and thankfully I've never had to experience such grief. Those must be truly brave souls choosing to suffer so much. All I've had is several miscarriages, which is nothing like loosing a child after he or she is born. I've had childhood friends that's been killed in car accidents, and I think this page is for them too, as one little boy that died was one of the sweetest and nicest boys I ever knew. I like to think he moved on to another fairytale and enjoyed another life there filled with wonders. Even if his family missed him dreadfully it makes it all more bareable thinking like that, instead of him being gone for ever. I know you are never gone for ever. Not even those loosing their souls, as their souls are only lost to the body, the soul itself never dies. 

Queen Angelica - Fairyland Poetry

Remaking this blog

About my blog

This blog has been in swedish so far, which is good if you don't want many to understand it, since there are so few people knowing swedish and of these few people - less then 10 million - only at most 1% would ever consider reading stuff like this. That is less then 100 000 people. The chance that anyone of these will end up on this blog is micro small, so I've decided to write in english. There must be atleast 1-2 billion people out there knowing english, and if 1% could possible be interested in any of my subjects that means a hell of a lot more possible visitors. Atleast in theory. Besides, my subjects will not be only about Sweden and my home town or anything else very close and personal. It will be about many things. Like my website is. I've already written several presentations about my website, but since it is the same theme on the blog it is worth repeating and this time in english.

 
About my website

My website is situated on the domain vetteljus.se - that is the place to go to find links to all other sites of mine. Vetteljus the main page is just that - a sitemap. But at the same time it gives out lots of information and stuff, so there is not only links on it - far from it.

My Green World

I've sorted my websites into three main groups. The first is mainly about our day to day life and strife and that part I've called My Green World and placed it under the title 'Gröna Hus', which means Green Houses. There are four green houses to choose from called in swedish 'Tamburen', 'Matsalen', 'Kammaren' and 'Djurparken'. In english that is the Hall, the Diningroom, the Chamber and the Zoo. Of course the Zoo is all about our animals and that is the only house which is not filled with links, but more of photos. Now and then I put up adds on pets we have to sell, but lately I've been really lazy doing that. We have right now 7 ginny-pigs, 13 rabbits and 9 grown cats. We also have 3 small kitties, but they are all spoken for, and we have 1 rooster and my youngest son has 1 tiny mouse. I've also created a "Green Pill" as a quick link to the only mailinglist there is for My Green World - Magnolia Lane. Wherever on my site you'll find this Green Pill you can go directly to Magnolia Lane. There is another mailinglist My Green World belongs to and it is a list of creativity named 'Romeo och Julia', as in Romeo and Juliette. Please join it if you are interested in HEALTH, ENVIRONMENT, ANIMALS, CHILDREN and are pro-family and want our world to be a wonderful place for children to grow up in. I send out information I've found elsewhere on these subjects and more. I also share my green graphics there.

 

My Blue Sky

The second group I sorted my website into is more about our view of reality and history. I've called this part My Blue Sky and it's under the title 'Blåa Hus', which means Blue Houses. The first three houses are named the same as the green ones, but the forth is called 'Biblioteket', which means the Library. Here you can find a few books, and planned books (though I'm not sure the last one about Runes ever will be realized). I sell the book on Atlantis, which is really really good. It is way more cheaper to buy from me then from those sharlatans that sell it on the internet, so if you want a copy just send me a mail and I'll tell you more. I have about 500 copies left and I only sell to EU. If you're from US you have to contact the author, since he has more copies.

My Blue Pill is of course taken from the movie The Matrix and it links you wherever you find it to my main page in My Blue Sky - Fairyland Poetry - which has its own mailinglist. There are two more mailinglists My Blue Sky belongs to and that is 'Sagan Om Ringen', which directly translated means the Saga of the Ring, but it is really the swedish title for the Lord of the Rings saga, and a second one named 'Romeo och Julia', as in Romeo and Juliette. You are most welcome to join any of these two if you are interested in either HISTORY, RELIGION, ROYALTY, BOOKS and/or FANTASY and FAIRYTALES and have a curious mind to learn more about our matrix, aka the theatre we call reality. Like I said above I'll be sending out information I see fit and also share my blue graphics on both the lists.

My Red Heart

The last group I came up with is My Red Heart and it's trying to peak behind the veil and look for the occult. You'll find it under the title 'Röda Hus', that is Red Houses". Like before the first three houses are named as above, while the forth is called 'Bildateljén', which kind of means the Artstudio, or similar. There I have put up some of the graphics I've done in my PSP-classes with PSP-pals, since I feel creativity is the secret behind the love-energy which penetrates all of creations; the spirit behind our Matrix-reality. I know that sounds weird, but whilst you understand the deeper concept of matter it is not weird at all. Venus is both love and creativity, for instance in astrology. You may download and share the graphics as you like, but I have no idea if there is any so called copyrights involved, so be ware if you live in a very controlled society.

There is a total of three mailinglists for this My Red Heart and you'll come to the main ones website by clicking on the Red Pill I've put up. This, the main site, is called 'Kärlekens Cirkel', which means the Circle of Love. There is three more lists My Red Heart belongs to and the first one is called 'Odjurens Tid', or the Time of the Beasts, the second one is 'Sagan Om Ringen', which directly translated means the Saga of the Ring, but it is really the swedish title for the Lord of the Rings saga. The third list is named 'Romeo och Julia', as in Romeo and Juliette. If any of these subjects intressed you, please join. What all of these groups really are about is too much to put up here, so go to the websites and check them out yourself. But in short the first is about MYSTERIES, ENERGIES, DIMENSIONS, SPIRITUALITY and dealing with alot of different topics which all are a little out there for the square minds. The second list is dealing with PROPHESIES and EVIL, while the third is about CREATIVITY and LOVE. I'll be sending out very odd information on all these lists, which might be too much for most to take so be aware, and I'll also now and then send some of my "red" graphics for sharing.

Summary

By adding all these wide range of subjects into my domain I could not just simply say: My site is about UFOs, or something. It is about everything I feel is important. You will not find that I've limited myself to any specific worshipping. I don't do that, and never have had an idol in my whole life. There has been people doing beautiful things, having wise thoughts and being brave and courageous and I am the first to show them my appreciation. But am not, and never will, worship them. They've done something worthwhile and that is good for them, but they are still only human beings, whith all the limitations that means in our very restrictes reality. And that is just it. Our reality is really just My Green World, since that is all we percieve in our five sences. All the rest is just what we imagin to be out there. We imagin things by studying and having scientific results, which contruct theories that anytime might be brought down by new revelations. Only today science in many occasions have become a religion, where no proof is allowed to damage the dogmas in a huge number of areas. Atleast not publicly, why there is so much rumours and stories of hidden technology, hidden cures and so on. We live in an economic world where money truly makes the world go round. Only it need not be this way. But it is cause we live only in the world we percieve as being the one that is real.

Our reality

So when we study, write books and try to imagin what is out there in the past, in the heavens, we are actually functioning on the level I would think of as My Blue Sky. We try to look up into the sky, symbolically, and wish for things to be, perhaps an angel who'd come and rescue us all from damnation. We'd search in books, libraries, scholars and all over the place to have something to believe in, which would give us that precious hope. There are ancient truths and great old filosophers, some of them thousands of years old, where we can find truths that ring beautiful in our ears, and there are plenty of messianic figures who have that knowledge today and know how to tell us these ancient truths like they just were enlightened by them. Some people portray themselves as very enlightened and gets lots of followers who truly believe this is a bright and shining star to follow, if you like to find the truth. Some of their followers will want to also be reckognized as bright people and start their own little groups.

 

I really wish to write more about this fenomenon, since here is a catch. Since they are both idolizing one messianic figure they are really having a blind spot. So while they are trying to act enlightened and tell their listeners how stupid they are for idolizing and worshipping, they are doing the very same thing, only they can't see it. Cause that is how it works in our matrix. It's a very fascinating thing to study and I would never dream to put anyone down for doing this, not even a person who calls me stupid and ignorant, while himself doing exactly what he blames other for doing. I would study all the peoples reactions and see that the rude person soon would find himself being attacked or ignored by both foes and friends. Some very few would stick around to be insulted. That is what happens when we are operating inside this program, which on a basic level is what I describe as My Green World, but also includes our imagined reality in books, movies, media and all things I include in My Blue Sky.

My dreams
I had two dream. In the first one I was a true GODDESS. I had unimaginable powers and I could do anything. But when I saw the humans not understanding our true reality, beyond our wildest imagination, far far out there which only I can sence within the deepest corner of My Red Heart, I was so very upset and saddened. I wanted to interfer in humanities progress into full conciousness of our wonderful and fantastic REAL reality, which I was then fully aware of and operating in. But when I tried to do so I only made things worse - much worse. There was a law I could not break inside the matrix which made me as an operator outside of it bounce when I tried to cheat. That was a big no no. I was so frustrated and woke up realizing that I was right all along; I can't force people to understand anything or believe anything. True knowledge they have to find themselves, in due time. Their game just have to take as long as it will for them.

 

In the second dream I was an ANGEL. I was now operating inside of the matrix, like in My Blue Sky and cause of that I was able to help people physically when they were in danger. I could come down on my wings and lift them up and save them, but I could not interfer with their spiritual progress. I could only be a helping angel. In the dream demonic forces got hold of me - they had no idea I was an angel. They tried to convince me to join them by tempting me with wonderful powers that would be mine if I did. I just laughed at them and through myself out of the very high building we were in. They gasped by astonishment, cause they truly believed I rather killed myself then joined them and that was a disapointment for them of course. But instead of falling flat to the ground I hung in the air, with my now visable bright wings, and still laughing softly said: I don't need your powers. Obviously cause I had far greater ones as I operated on a more creative level inside the matrix, trying to help others the best I could.

Speaking about dreams I had a couple of nice ones about serpents earlier on. In the first one my brother, the author of the Atlantis-book I'm selling, was there and a few others. There was a big snake and my brother wanted it to be killed - chop the head off - and gotten rid of once and for all. I was saddened, cause even if I knew it did very bad things, I wanted to take care of it and keep its essence, so I pulled the skin of it in a weird symbolic cleansing. In another dream my mother was there and a brightly yellow snake. She said to me to be careful, since the serpent could kill me. I disobeyed and reached out for the snake, which of course struck and bit my arm. I must have died, but while doing that I said to mother that I could not be killed, so she need not worry. I know she's old and worries alot about death, but has lately found great hope in that the soul never dies. There are many who says that we interact with other souls on the dreamlevel, so perhaps I tried here to help her know she was immortal by having this dream with her.

Ending

Now, this is enough for today. Like I said, my blog is about the same things as my website, and I'm not sure I will be writing here much. I've got so many other things to do and only writing this, without any investigations or linking to outside sourses has taken me well over two hours. But I have an idea I'd which to write down, as there is so much humbug going on in the spiritual awakening business that really makes me giggle as some 'know-it-alls' putting other people down for praising gurus, is at the same time living in a blind spot. No-one is perfect. Anyways, that would be fun to do, but I'm not really good at doing stuff like that, and it would need some disciplin. Right now I have a Garden Project going, which of course is connected to My Green World, health and growing your own food. In practice that only means I am fixing up our garden for a hell lot more growing space for next season, while harvesting what has grown this year. I know, the Garden Project title makes it sound so professional. I've also re-joined PSP-pals so I'll be doing a Graphics Project as well starting now in the autumn.

 

Love to all of you and if you would like to comment - please don't say anything really dumb, like the person who wrote that I should follow some law that was created 2 years AFTER the event I had mentioned here on this blog about our cat that was poisoned by our neighbour. Besides, that law didn't even had any effect NOW to what happened, so that was the most stupid comment I ever had gotten that I didn't even feel like replying to it, so I just deleted it. So keep it non-stupid and I will gladly add it, since I don't have any comments really, except for one very nice person and that is not much. But that is cause I write about subjects not interesting swedes I guess. Most swedes are far too intelligent and perfect to bother with a strange and peculiar person like myself. Good for them! Guess they will happily take their shots, eat their "Aromat", drink their Aspartame, use their Fluoride and live ever after, since the spirit is eternal.

Queen Angelica - Fairyland Poetry